Thursday, 27 September 2012

If you need to talk?


If you have questions you don't want to post on here, or you just need to talk to someone who knows what you are going through and will try to support you the best i can my details are:

Keep smiling

Suzi x



I have posted these photos to answer questions that other amputees have asked, and i want to help as much as i can.

Many people have asked me, what does your injury look like? Is it like mine? How long will it take to heal? Do you have any bones sticking out? Does it hurt? When will i be able to walk again?

Top of left thigh

This is a picture of the top of my left thigh, it has had a skin graft over bare muscle. as you can see i am missing the layer of fat and layers of skin you may still have. I also don't have any pores/ hair so when i get hot my leg just feels warm.
It's been 5 months since my accident and believe it or not this has greatly improved. The skin colour is slowly going to more pale pink were as before it looked like a beef burger. It is still sensitive a bit like if someone strokes the underside of your foot, but not painful. Those lines you can see are veins under the skin, that's how thin the skin is but it will thicken with time and fade. Also the skin on the left top is still swollen and i have very poor sensation in it which again will go down in time. (E45 is a god send use it day and night it makes your skin nice and flat)

To answer your question:.
1) how long will it take to heal? 
 Well my legs not going to grow back, but the scaring will fade. I have a scold on my chest with a skin graft which happened when i was 1 year old I'm now 33 and it is nearly flat and fading, just looks like a rash in hot weather. So 5 to 10 years to really start to fade.

2) do you have bones sticking out? 
When they took off my knee they had to saw down the thigh bone so that my muscle could be folded over to cover my bone. So on the top at the right end edge of my bone is close to the surface and feels like your elbow under your skin. except mine is under a thin layer of muscle. Unfortunately when i put on my prosthesis it can rub and sometime make a crunching feeling. i guess this will settle down with time.

3) When will i be able to walk again?
My accident was 5 months ago since then i have gone from a PAM aid to a starter prosthetic leg. It still needs tweaking and rubs in private areas but i am able to walk (with sticks) only short distances. But i will build this up and once the prosthetic is comfortable i will be able to do a lot more. If you still have your knee and you haven't had any complications with surgery then i have seen people get there prosthetic and they are walking without sticks within 3 months!. So it's all down to you really.

You've got to laugh


I went in for a small operation at Leeds General to have the bone in my fourth toe removed because it was loose and trying to work it's way out.
I also i have had a small spot on the side of my stump that wont stop bleeding/ oozing so i asked them to look at that whilst i was there. The theory was it was one of my deep stitches trying to work it's way out and the surgeon was just going to cortisone it.
Well the local anaesthetic injections hurt and it felt so weird having them pull and chip away at my bone with out feeling any pain.

Then they had a look at my side, they had an X-ray of my thigh on the light box next to me and i noticed little white blobs and a big white blob next to my bone and asked what they were.
The surgeon said they were road debris and assured me that when they removed and tidied up my leg after my accident great care was taken to remove all those bits including the big one to stop infection.
So he injected my side and then began to cut in, then after a while he said 'well it's not a stitch but there is definitely something there'.....then he pull out a large stone!
He said straight away 'i am so sorry, i am medically embarrassed i was so sure we looked all over your leg before putting on the skin graft i don't know how we could have missed this'!'
I was just so glad to have it out of me, and that explained why the spot wouldn't stop oozing because the rock under it was trying to slowly come to the surface!
So I'm now at home with stitches in my side and my toe and told to rest and not weight bare, so no practising on my leg for a while.

Saturday, 1 September 2012

not all days are good days

I hope so far my posts have been informative and even though i seem like everything is fine just like you i will have bad days.

These usually come after a nice dream about running and jumping and i wake up and pull back the blanket to go to the toilet and realise I'm missing my leg  or on a sunny day when i cant just pick up my dogs lead and take them for a nice long walk in the hills.

Its perfectly normal to cry, your life has now dramatically changed. I would talk to someone, anyone. A friend, or a professional. Personally i don't like talking to psychiatrists Ive found all they can do with their degrees is stare at you and ask you how you feel. But they cant possibly understand what Ive gone through, i would have felt more comfortable if they had lost a limb. But whoever it is you choose to talk to is fine, never bottle it up.

Also never think your alone, you have me for a start and when i can finally walk again i will be up that mountain with your support.
There are also disabled outdoor activity groups so you can hang around with someone who you know understands what you are going though or have gone through.

I am a very impatient person and want everything yesterday, that's why even when i have finally got to the point where i have my starter limb I'm upset because i cant walk with out using the bars for support. but just like with the P.A.M aid i will get down to two sticks its just going to take time. I have to keep reminding myself it has only been 4 months since my accident and i have only been out of hospital for 3 of them, my leg is still very tender and bleeds in places and my right foot still hurts so i do need to start listening to professionals and slow down, but when you have the chance to walk again waved in front of you its hard not to run at that goal!